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   My dog, Bolshoi the Boxer (September 9, 1991)

My dog, Bolshoi the Boxer, was saying: "I want to join the Indian bureaucracy."

"The things you come out with," I said. "Why and how do you want to join the Indian bureaucracy?"

"Because the prime minister has said that the Indian bureaucracy is a very well-trained animal sand once told what to do it will do it," Bolshoi said. "And I am very will-trained. So why should I not join the bureaucracy and make some money."

"Like all the bureaucrats, you are also taking what the prime minister said too literally," I said. "What's the matter, don't you understand English, and English pharaseology. As the prime minister himself. Explained, it is like saying all men are animals."

"Not once so far have you said you are an animal," Bolshoi said. "How can you claim that now! You are doing so just because you also want to be a bureaucrat."

"Please, I have no desire to be a bureaucrat. If I wanted to, I could have become one long back," I said. "And, let me tell you, there is nothing great in being an IAS officer, all it gets you is Punjabi brides through matrimonail advertisement."

"You are saying that because you can't be an IAS other and I can," Bolshoi said. "The prime minister wants well-trained animals like me to join the bureaucracy and I consider it my duty to hept him. I can also make some money."

"Not any more, with the removal of this licence-permit raj, you can't make any money," I said. "Besides, the prime minister did not mean, what he said. It is only these bureaucrats, who take everything officially and literally and want to put down in duplicates and triplicates, attested by other bureaucrats, who are interperting it wrongly."

"If the prime minister did not mean what he said, he would not have said it in Germany," Bolshoi said. "The Germans are not fools, and they care for their dogs. They are the world's greatest dog lovers."

"Now you are confusing the Germans with the English," I said. "The English are dog lovers, though even they are turning against their dogs now, after they have started attacking their children."

"I don't care what you say, I am joining the IAS," Bolshoi said. "Either you write an application to the prime minister or I will approach him muself and tell hom how you are trying to keep me out of the bureaucracy and twisting his words."

"Very wll, I will apply," I said. "But, if you are selected, what sort of a position would you like to hold, as deputy secretary or additional secretary or what?"

"I don't know," Bolshoi said. "I think I would like to have the kind of job that Mr. Mani Shankar Aiyar had."

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