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   I understand that Mr. Rajiv Gandhi is having the same... (October 14, 2002)

I understand that Mr. Rajiv Gandhi is having the same sort of problems every morning that most people who got to these conducted tours of 12 countries in 14 days have.

For instance, this morning Mr. Gandhi got up in a strange bed in what looked like a President's palace, looked at the date slot on his watch, and said to his wife: "If it is Tuesday, it must be Belgium."

"No, no," Mrs. Gandhi said, "if it is Tuesday, it must be Bangkok. I distinctly remember making a note in my diary that on Tuesday we would be in Bangkok and I should buy some of their lovely jade."

Mr. Gandhi said: "If it is Tuesday, it is Bangkok next Tuesday. You are confusing your dates, it is next Tuesday we are going to be in Bangkok, not this."

"Possibly, as always, you are right," Mrs.Gandhi said. Then she tought for a while and added: "If it is Tuesday, it must be Reykjavik. Our papers are writing so much about it so you must be there."

"Not Reykjavik the meeting there is not of the Third World countries, whose cause I am championing. Though, take my word for it, one day I will be there and you will be with me. They make very good sweaters there," Mr. Gandhi said. "But where could we be this morning!"

Mrs. Gandhi drew the curtains apart looked out, then said: "It does look a little like Delhi with all our security men around. But we cannot possibly be in Delhi, you are never there on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays and a few other days."

Mr. Gandhi said: "If it is Tuesday, it could be Moscow. After Belgium, Moscow is my second favourite city for Tuesdays. But it cannot be Moscow, because I do not recall suspending any pilot for engine failure yesterday."

Mrs. Gandhi said: "Let us think what we were doing yesterday. I will think of what you were doing and you will think of what I was doing. You were making a speech at a banquet and talking about interaction. You talk a lot about interaction these days, you know."

Mr. Gandhi said: "That is neither here nor there. Now let me think, what you were doing yesterday. You were going around, being shown things. And you were looking at them, not smiling."

"If it is Tuesday, it must be Canberra," Mrs. Gandhi said.

"If it is Tuesday, it must be Auckland," Mr. Gandhi said.

Later, as they were dressing up to go out into the unidentified city and another day of adventure, Mr. Gandhi said: "There is one more thing that is bothering me; are we on a TCI tour or a Sita Travels tour or Lala's!"

 
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