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   The following tips I have gathered from friends... (September 5, 1990)

The following tips I have gathered from friends, well-whishers and experts on how to live through the warm days of the present summer season:

l Proceed to Mahableshwar by the first available luxury air-condditioned bus and spend

a month there.

Visit Switzerland.

l Install an air-conditioner is the house and stay at home.

l Tell your boss to air-condition the office, or, if the office is already air-conditioned,

ask the boss to keep the cooling system on even when he is not present in the office.

l Have two bottled of shilled beer with lunch.

Buy a boat and go sailing. Or ask Hiro Shorff to hire a boat and take you sailing.

l Become a member of the Breach Candy Swimming pool (this applies to foreigners

only).

l Don't read weather reports.

l Read weather reports of places that are warmer than Bombay.

l Install a swimming-pool in your house (this does not apply to foreigners who can use

the Breach Candy pool).

Move into a five-star hotel.

Wait for June and the rains.

Drink Rooh-Afza.

Have a summer crop from Raoul Miranda.

Have a siesta evey afternoon, between 1 p.m. and 4.30 p.m.

Go to The Resort, Marve, for the next three weekends.

Pray for rains.

Get a job in an ice factory.

Stop dicussing the weather. And make a resolution not to say more than twice in one day: "It's stinking hot."

Think positive. Think: The warmer the weather, the better the mango crop.

Buy a Kelvinator refrigerator. It s the coolest.

 
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