A rather strange thing happened yesterday. The bhaiya who brings me my newpapers and magazines every day brought me a paper which looked like a poor man's edition of the Sunday Times Of India and insisted it was the Illustrated Weekly Of India.
"Jao, jao, aap kiya bolta hai ji," I said. "Yeh kuch Illustrated Weekly beekly nahi hai ji, yeh toe garib aadmi ka Aitwar ka Times Of India lagta hai ji."
"Nahi ji, yeh tow Illustrated Weekly hi hai ji," the bhaiya said. "Kuch thoda so chotta motta badli kiya hai ji, magar hai toe Illustrated Weelky he."
"Aap kiya hum ko shikata hai! Hum bola na, yeh Illustrated Weekly nahi hai," I said. "Sura gaon ka naqli maal hamare darwaza per lata hai aur humkoo ullu banata hai. C.R. Mandy saab ka jamuna se hum Illustrated Weekly padhte the, hajam lok ki dukan may baith ke. Hum koo bilqulmalum, kiya Weekly hai aur kiya banavati hai."
"Aap ka baat theek hai, saab, magar abhi jamana badal gaiya hai. Aisa to aap ka Khushwant Singh saab bhi that, ganda towel ka khamis pahen ke aate the hamara stall pe. Uska Weekly may pura bina kapde ki aurut thi, moti, moti aurat. Magar abhi yeh jamae may yeh hai Illustrated Weekly."
"Aisa ho he nahi Shakta," I said. "Who Bennett Coleman ka company aisa Weekly kabhi raaste pe aane he nahi daiyga. Uski pahele toe who bandh ke dalega, pura magazine."
"Abhi mai kiya bataoon!" the bhaiya said. "Dekho, aap toe padhe like aadmi hai. Yeh naam padho Ė Illustrated Weekly Of India. Hai na? Toe phir aap kaise bol shakte hai ke yeh Weekly nahi hai?"
"Arre wah! Wah, wah, wah!" I said. "Naam se kiya baat hai. Kal aap ka editor Economic Times pe Femina ka naam laga daiega, toe kiya who Femina ho jaiga!"
"Hum koo toe yeh sub nahi malum," the bhaiya said. "Hum koo toe Pritish Nandy ssab ne bola ke yeh Illustreated Weekly hai, aap sub bhaiya lok jao aur becho, public sub khusi se laiga. Toe phir hum bechte hai. Bhav be aadha ker dala hai."
"Asha!" I said. "Aacha kiya hai!"
At this stage, the wife intervened. "What are you fighting with the poor bhaiya early in the morning for. If you were to read Pritish Nandy, you would know what is happening. Here he is pioneering non-glazed newprint magazines to save the country valuable foreign exchange, and you don't even know anything about it."