The wife was saying: "If you were a lawyer you could have defended Mr. Narasimha Rao in court."
"It so happens I am not a lawyer, I am reporter," I said. "Why goin to these things!"
"I am merely saying what you could have done if you were a lawyer," the wife said. "Mr. Rao would have been so happy to have had you regal assistance."
"There are enough lawyers to assist him, though let me tell you, no lawyer is going to save him," I said. "The evidence against him is very strong and indefensible."
"How could you know that!" the wife said. "You are not a lawyer."
"You don't have to be a lawyer to know that," I said. "Common sense would tell you that the prosecution will make mincemeat out of the former prime minister."
"That is when the beauty of your being a lawyer would have come in," the wife said. "When everybody said that the former prime minister had no chance and the court was going to find him guilty, you would have stepped in, taken the brief, and turned the evidence around. Unfortunately, you are not a lawyer."
"You are seeing too many Hindi films, the law does not operate like that," I said. "A good lawyer has to argue on evidence before the court. He is not your Raj Babbar that he can get up in court and twist things around."
"You are just saying that because you are not a lawyer," the wife said. "And when I was talking about what a good lawyer can do, I was not thinking of your film heroes, I was thinking of Mr. Nani Palkhivala."
"Mr. Palkhivala does not do criminal cases, Mr. Jethmalani does. And what would Mr. Jethmalani have done! Asked ten questions every day to Mr. Lakhubhai Pathak and Mr. Chandraswami!"
"I do not know what they would have done, but I wish you had done it and not them," the wife said. "How nice it would have been if you were defending Mr. Rao, you would have become celebrity. Imagine you in a black robe and white wig like your Dickie Bird."
"Dickie Bird is not a lawyer, he is, was, a cricket umpire. And you don't; wear black robes inmagistrate' courts, and wigs, never. That's British," I said.
"I am sure they would have made an exception in your case, and let you wear robe and wig, since you were defending the prime minsiter," the wife said. "You would have come in ‘News Tonight', in your uniform, with all the reporters crowding around you, asking for your comments. Even as a reporter, you don't come in ‘News Tonight'."
"Let's not go on like this," I said. "The fact is, I am not a lawyer."
"Then you could have at least been a politician," the wife said. "Instead of Mr. Pawar, today you would have been tipped to take over as Congress president and ultimately become prime minister."